Freedom is never more than one generation away from extinction. We didn't pass it to our children in the bloodstream. It must be fought for, protected, and handed on for them to do the same.


Thursday, December 30, 2010

2011 Rings in New Hope!!

Thoughts, feelings and emotions that hopefully provoke the purest of minds...Capturing thoughts through written words is like capturing pictures on film or digital camera.

In just two days, 2010 will be nothing but a recent past. Time is ever changing and ticking endlessly. I does not wait, does not discriminate nor it has mercy on anybody, but fate.

Looking back at the years gone by; I have realized that I have grown older and wiser. It is not the same as it was once used to be. Yet, life has become more meaningful. Through its ups and downs; nothing is ever the same; but we all know that challenges are there for us to conquer.

As the clock ticks and counting down is nearer to 2011; my wish is that the new year will ring new hope, spring new fortune, renew spirit, bring happiness and sum up healthy heart. Let the old be past and let the new be forth coming. I look to that day when the clock strikes 1st January again.

Undone resolutions will not be forgotten yet refreshed. New ones will be promised and to be taken seriously. Yet for I only know that time is testament of real actions. One thing for sure is that I am older and is much wiser. I will in no doubt will follow through with my commitments for 2011.

Wednesday, December 29, 2010

Leaving Lasting Impression! Kavey Kamsot - Poetic Justice

Thoughts, feelings and emotions that hopefully provoke the purest of minds...Capturing thoughts through written words is like capturing pictures on film or digital camera.

Whatever our hands touch...we leave fingerprints on.
On walls, on furniture, on door knobs, dishes and books.

As we touch we leave our identity..
Oh please where ever I go today...help me leave heart prints.

Heart prints of compassion, understanding and love.
Heart prints of kindness and genuine concern.

May my heart touch a lonely neighbor...or a broken hearted girl...
or an anxious mother...or perhaps a dear friend!

I shall go out today...to leave heart prints...
and if some one should say..."I felt your touch!"

Yearning For Your Love? Kavey Kamsot - Poetic Justice

Thoughts, feelings and emotions that hopefully provoke the purest of minds...Capturing thoughts through written words is like capturing pictures on film or digital camera.

Things that seem pretty, seem beautiful are all too familiar
If we use our eyes to look at those things

But you are not like anyone else I have ever met before
I see you in my heart

The expressions of your eyes and your voice are like cool water soothing my soul
Every time my heart suffers and torn of lonesome

Both your hands are like medicine relieving it
Pulling the words of loneliness and despair out from it…

True love, wherever it is placed; there will be a glimmering sparkle that reminds me of you.
From outside, you aren’t different from anyone

But inside your heart, you have genuine love that no one else has
I want to tell you that I love you and will always will.

And I want to be at your side from now on till the end of time
I yearn to be with you for the rest of my life, may I?

Let’s the bad days passed, you and I won’t be lonely again.
From now onwards, I long to be with you always my precious love.

The Power of What We Can Choose

Thoughts, feelings and emotions that hopefully provoke the purest of minds...Capturing thoughts through written words is like capturing pictures on film or digital camera.


Sambath is the kind of guy you love to hate. He is always in a good mood and always has something positive to say. When someone would ask him how he was doing, he would reply, "If I were any better, I would be twins!" He was a unique manager because he had several waiters who had followed him around from restaurant to restaurant.

The reason the waiters followed Sambath was because of his attitude. He was a natural motivator. If an employee was having a bad day, Sambath was there telling the employee how to look on the positive side of the situation.

Seeing this style really made me curious, so one day I went up to Sambath and asked him, I don't get it! You can't be a positive person all of the time. How do you do it?" Sambath replied, "Each morning I wake up and say to myself, Sambath, you have two choices today. You can choose to be in a good mood or you can choose to be in a bad mood.

I choose to be in a good mood. Each time something bad happens, I can choose to be a victim or I can choose to learn from it. I choose to learn from it. Every time someone comes to me complaining, I can choose to accept their complaining or I can point out the positive side of life. I choose the positive side of life.

"Yeah, right, it's not that easy," I protested. "Yes, it is," Sambath said. "Life is all about choices. When you cut away all the junk, every situation is a choice. You choose how you react to situations. You choose how people will affect your mood. You choose to be in a good mood or bad mood. The bottom line: It's your choice how you live life."

I reflected on what Sambath said. Soon thereafter, I left the restaurant industry to go into electronics and security. We lost touch, but I often thought about him when I made a choice about life instead of reacting to it.

Several years later, I heard that Sambath did something you are never supposed to do in a restaurant business: he left the back door open one morning and was held up at gun point by three armed robbers. While trying to open the safe, his hand, shaking from nervousness, slipped off the combination. The robbers panicked and shot him. Luckily, Sambath was found relatively quickly and rushed to the local trauma center. After 18 hours of surgery and weeks of intensive care, Sambath was released from the hospital with fragments of the bullets still in his body.

I saw Sambath about six months after the accident. When I asked him how he was, he replied, "If I were any better, I'd be twins. Wanna see my scars?" I declined to see his wounds, but did ask him what had gone through his mind as the robbery took place. “The first thing that went through my mind was that I should have locked the back door," Sambath replied. "Then, as I lay on the floor, I remembered that I had two choices: I could choose to live or I could choose to die. I chose to live."

"Weren't you scared? Did you lose consciousness?" I asked. Sambath continued, "...the paramedics were great. They kept telling me I was going to be fine. But when they wheeled me into the ER and I saw the expressions on the faces of the doctors and nurses, I got really scared. In their eyes, I read 'he's a dead man.'

I knew I needed to take action." " What did you do?" I asked. "Well, there was a big burly nurse shouting questions at me," said Sambath. "She asked if I was allergic to anything. 'Yes,' I replied. The doctors and nurses stopped working as they waited for my reply. I took a deep breath and yelled, 'Bullets!' Over their laughter, I told them, 'I am choosing to live. Operate on me as if I am alive, not dead.'"

Sambath lived thanks to the skill of his doctors, but also because of his amazing attitude. I learned from him that every day we have the choice to live fully. Attitude, after all, is everything.


Positive thinking the the first step towards a happy life.

Attitude is everything

If everyone applies just these, the whole world will live in happiness.

Tuesday, December 28, 2010

Make Sure You Check Your Email Address Before a Message is Sent!!

Thoughts, feelings and emotions that hopefully provoke the purest of minds...Capturing thoughts through written words is like capturing pictures on film or digital camera.

It's wise to remember how easily email -- this wonderful technology -- can be misused, sometimes unintentionally, with serious consequences. Read this short funny story....


A man left the flood-filled streets of Phnom Penh for a vacation in Kampong Som. His wife was on a business trip and was planning to meet him there the next day. When he reached his hotel, he decided to send his wife a quick email.

Unfortunately, when typing her address, he missed one letter, and his note was directed instead to an elderly general's wife whose husband had passed away only the day before. When the grieving widow checked her email, she took one look at the monitor, let out a piercing scream, and fell to the floor in a dead faint.

At the sound, her family rushed into the room and saw this note on the screen:

Dearest Wife,
Just got checked in. Everything prepared for your arrival tomorrow.

P.S. Sure is hot down here

Adapted from older American version...Anonymous

Sunday, December 26, 2010

Ch. 4: Heading to a Dangerous Hole (The Betrayal) - bits and pieces from my book..

Thoughts, feelings and emotions that hopefully provoke the purest of minds...Capturing thoughts through written words is like capturing pictures on film or digital camera.
After 4 years in the United State, Sopheap disliked the life style and the fact that she had to work a 9-to 5 job. She wanted to return to Cambodia. Piseth, at his wife’s repeated requests began to make preparations for her to return home. By this time, Lily had been born and now 5 years old. Sopheap wanted to take Lily back as well because she felt that Lily would be better living with her in Cambodia. Final preparations were made and Piseth was to accompany both of them back to Cambodia.

Sopheap was overjoyed when she landed at Phnom Penh International airport and she knows that she will be free again to do whatever she wishes to do. Due to Piseth commitment to his work and investments in the USA; he decided to come back after making arrangements for a new house to be built on a plot of land they bought in Battambang 5 years earlier.

Piseth by this time still have his hotel investments in Siam Reap, Kampong Som and Phnom Penh and were generating significant amount of returns. But he wanted to come back to the US to work at on his investments that he started 7 years earlier. Both Sopheap and Piseth decided that it would be good for both of them to live separately for the time being until Piseth’s businesses in the US got settled and ready to be run on their own.

Piseth left Cambodia and returned to the US in despair leaving his wife and a daughter there on their own yet with the support of cousins and mother-in-law. Life was beautiful at the beginning but as time went on, Sopheap began to have an affair with a guy affiliated with the Military Police after many late nights at the clubs. Sopheap newly found freedom with money and support from abroad led her into night scenes of clubbing, drugs and gambling.

Every night, Piseth would call to Sopheap and life seemed to be normal for Sopheap. Sopheap would always responded that everything was alright and under-control. Piseth never doubted his wife because of his love for her. He would only suspect on why Sopheap never let him talk to his child whenever he called to her in Cambodia. It may sound strange; but life was as normal and happy as any husband would ever hoped for because of the ways things were communicated to Piseth by Sopheap.

Things gradually went downhill after Sopheap heavy gambling addictions. Sopheap would be gone from home for weeks on end, living a player’s life in high end casinos in Phnom Penh, Thai-Cambodia town of Poipet and Bavet, Vietnamese Cambodia border. These were the new haven s for illegal gambling, drug dens, sexual trade and re-known for money laundering. She managed to sell most of her jewelry that Piseth had bought for her during their time together.

It was in spring 2008, Sunday morning, the phone rang. It was Sopheap pleading Piseth to come to Cambodia right away because their daughter has gotten very ill. Piseth, by this time has not seen his daughter and wife for than a year decided to get the next flight out to see his daughter who was supposedly sick in Battambang, Cambodia.

On board a jumbo jet bounded for home, Piseth reminisced the memories that he had with his wife and the good times together. He felt a sense of pride that Sopheap was able to turn her life around and became a good wife and a good mother. Sopheap’s hardship during her teenage years made her strong and made her who she was to Piseth, a respectable wife.

Upon touching down at Phnom Penh International Airport, Piseth passed the immigration check point and checked out lonely without the fanfare that he used to get during his earlier trips to Cambodia. This time, his arrival sort of marked a time of sorrow, loneliness, despair, and a sense of a broken man. Can it be that these feelings will lead to events that were ready to unfold before his very eyes?

Piseth did not stay in Phnom Penh. He told the airport taxi driver to take him to the bus station in which he will travel on to Battambang to meet his wife and daughter who waited for him at home.

It was late in the evening when Piseth arrived in Battambang. When Piseth arrived at home, he was shocked to see that his mansion had been boarded up with planks of wood. His wife was nowhere to be seen. Disturbed by the scene, he walked over to his neighbor’s house to ask them about what had happened. Apparently, the house had been pawned by his wife so that she could fulfilled her crave for Ecstasy, Yama and her gambling addiction.

Sopheap was nowhere to be seen and none of her family members were able to reach her because she managed to switch her phone off. The news of the daughter being ill was just a story made up to seduce Piseth to come back. By this time, Sopheap had been planning something very grand. Was it greed, addictions, and lost love? It was difficult to gauge Sopheap’s mind. One could only imagine that she would have changed for the better for herself and her family.

Painting You In My Heart

Thoughts, feelings and emotions that hopefully provoke the purest of minds...Capturing thoughts through written words is like capturing pictures on film or digital camera.

Unable to see through your wandering spirit,
Unfathomable, the color of your pupils,

A passing wind, a waking dream,
Like life, love remains undefined,

Your heart, what confuses it so?
The outline of your body disappears into the night..

I watch the cherry blossoms, I wait to see their blooms,
I watch you, embracing me, your eyes lonelier than the moonlight..

And I let you seek happiness in someone else's arms,
Loving you, untouchable like a heartbeat..

Painting you, I cannot paint your skeleton,
Remembering your face, my reason to persist in waiting for you..

Your are mine, a song that I will never finish singing,
As I continue to watch the cheery blossoms and I will continue to wait again to see their blooms...

I will always love you till the end of time,
My love and only love...return to me and never leave again...

@Johnny C. 12/26/2010

Saturday, December 25, 2010

Ch. 3: An Unfortunate Coup - Excerpt from my book "Betrayal"

Thoughts, feelings and emotions that hopefully provoke the purest of minds...Capturing thoughts through written words is like capturing pictures on film or digital camera.

Chapter 3 ”An Unfortunate Coup” The Betrayal

A new beginning for Piseth’s life has just begun with a purchase of a small farm in Piseth’s father home town. Piseth started to plant coconut, mango, soup mint, lime and other edible plants. In additions, he started the building of a leisure farm house for his family for weekend retreats

. It was a time of re-union and re-connection with many of Piseth’s relatives of whom he had never known existed only after he had arrived in Cambodia.

It was a happy and peaceful time in Piseth’s mind after many decades of war, oppression, killings, and confusion. Life now has new meaning for people living in the big cities as well as in the countryside. New Toyota Land Cruisers, Toyota Camry, Honda Motorcycles and French Peugeots were dominating the streets of Phnom Penh; replacing the old traditional Cyclos that began to fade the scene as a sign of modernization. Cellular phones and icom radios were the principal communication tools for most city dwellers. In a city better known as city of ghost; it was now filled with economic vibrancy, laughter, and many promises for the future.

Laid back, they enjoyed their weekends on un-exploited beaches in the coastal towns of Kampong Som and Kampot provided native Cambodians and foreigners a sense of heavenliness with its natural beauty, tranquility, and delicious tastes of the local cuisines—from curry crabs to steamed clams to barbeque lobsters.

Kien Svay resort, closest to the capital city, was the main destination for many of the expatriates and Cambodian returnees. Piseth and his family would sit and relax under the lamut trees (a close resemblance of kiwi fruit) which give delightful shade and the exotic experience in rows of hammock. They were pampered by great services from nice young girls with broken English serving Cambodian native jack fruits, deep fried crickets, and nicely steamed river prawns. Better yet, taking a dip in the Mekong River and relaxing on the floating houses by the river front after a long day of work.

In such a short time span, one can observe and see with obvious curiosity; the rise of the nouveau riches. The young affluent businessmen, the rich and powerful politicians were dominating the flamboyant scenes of Phnom Penh restaurants, spas, night clubs, and KTV joints.

Piseth’s wife was in her early pregnancy with their first child. In additions, he had just adopted a five years old niece who was an orphan to be a part of his family. Having the niece was their first taste of raising a child and also their attempt to make preparations for raising their own children.

Piseth had also just opened up a private school to provide opportunities and exposure to young students on literature, basic economics, computers, and of course English language to prepare his fellow Cambodians for job opportunities anticipated from direct foreign investments.

The flow of foreign investments was gradual and trickling in the areas of construction, manufacturing, and trade of fast moving consumable goods. An influx of foreign visitors was also the familiar scenes in the capital city of Phnom Penh with bustling moto-taxis, and public buses mainly from neighboring countries such as Thailand, Singapore, Malaysia, Taiwan and China.

New buildings were sprouting in every part of the city. Bars, nightclubs, massage parlors, restaurants and other entertainment outlets were opening up like mushrooms and also fading away at the same rate. As a new comer to Cambodia, Piseth felt a sense of home, but was very cautious of his new surroundings.

The new taste of freedom began to dissipate into an era of lawlessness due to the political infighting. Day by day, Piseth began to see the escalation of military presence and anarchy. Pick up trucks loaded with soldiers carrying AK47; M16 and grenade launchers began to dominate the scenes of Phnom Penh and the surrounding suburbs. Noodle shops were crowded with military leaders and bodyguards, which gave airy feelings that something big was about to happen.

The year was 1997, three years after the first democratic election and a coalition government was formed. Ordinary people were enjoying their new taste of freedom. Farmers were busy planting their crops, and retailers were busy touting passing by consumers. To say the least, the returnees; those displaced by war in different camps along the Thai border. To the returnees, catching up with old friends and families was important. For the politicians and the military leaders a war of words between the different factions namely; Funcipec, Cambodian People’s Party (CPP), and the Cheeat Khmer Party, later known as the Sam Rainsy Party, was beginning to fuel to something extraordinary.

In July 1997, political rivalries spilled into sporadic violence in the rural towns and the capital city of Phnom Penh. A build up of troops was apparent in strategic locations in and around Phnom Penh. Another civil war or as some chose to call it coup d’état was in the making. This time, Piseth understood the situation a little better, he was able to comprehend the situation and the environment that he was living in compared to the one he experienced in 1975 where he was only ten years old.

Who would have dreamed that one day Piseth would be home to experience the horrific event of war once again?

In Piseth’s mind, he had always thought of peace and prosperity and a new spring of renewed friendship that was seeding for a new Cambodia. Piseth’s thoughts were much of peace, love, development and respect for one another. He had completely forgotten the brutal years of starvation, killing, and long days in the field which was no less than 20 plus years.

Piseth and his family were out shopping at Central Market (Psar Thmei). All of the sudden, people at the market begin to fold and close their doors. Piseth was confused and startled. Piseth asked one of the stall owners and found out that a big explosion was heard near the police’s chief home in central Phnom Penh. As they hurried home, they could feel tension rising in the air with people hurrying home and ignoring traffic police and apparent uniformed soldiers stationed at the different street intersections and key government compounds.

Piseth rushed his wife and child home. Soon after they arrived home, he heard a loud explosion about 200 meters away from his home. Ironically, the war had just begun. Six people were blown to pieces from the first wave of shelling. The first six casualties of war included a professor of technology of whom Piseth had known for a couple of years. The professor was sitting in a barbershop where the shell hit and exploded. A gentle man, he was getting his hair cut in preparations for the next day’s departure to France for his one year internship. A father of five, he had so much to offer because of his knowledge and experience in soil and mineral engineering.

Piseth’s heart throbbed after having heard the news of the first casualties so close to home. Half an hour later, sound of gun fights and bombing began to again echo in the city. Piseth’s family took cover under the first floor of their house. They could feel the rumbling noise streaming through as the bombing drew near their home. A couple of coconut branches fell in their front yard as they were hit by streaming bullets. For a moment, they had thought that their house had been hit. Piseth screamed and yelled and instructed people in Piseth’s family and his neighbors to stay inside and take cover.


A couple of houses were under raging fire from the explosion just about 100 meters away. They tried to remain calm but soon they found themselves in panic and getting ready to flee their own home. They have heard that the military had just stationed their artillery gun at the roundabout about 100 meters away from Piseth’s home. Piseth thought that when there is an artillery gun; incoming fire will directly be aimed at this target; hence, he must prepare his family to move out. Piseth was not about to take the risk in speculating that the gunner on the opposite side will have mercy?

A back pack filled with instant noodles, sugar, salt, rice, and fermented fish was already on Piseth’s shoulder. Piseth’s wife was so frightened that she started to pack a whole suitcase of dirty clothes. Obviously, it was not a time for us to fight about packing for a long trip; but a time of comfort and survival. Piseth told her that they will be walking, and the most important things in time of war were foods and water. Piseth got a bike and put his daughter on it and began to walk and pushing the bike along. They could not go very fast because Piseth’s wife was pregnant.

Scenes of chaos and people fleeing their homes reminded him of the 1975 mass exodus when the Khmer Rouge took over the country. He will never forget a young boy pulling his wounded mother on his small makeshift wagon, and crying profusely for help….unheard by others, he continued to pull his mother forward in the same direction that Piseth and family were going. Fortunately, Piseth’s uncle was empty handed and was able to assist him in pulling the cart.

About 600 meters away was a Buddhist temple, and Piseth felt that because of the sturdy structure they would be able to take cover there from the intense bombing.

All of a sudden, a loud explosion and pieces of yellow garment flew in the air. And they knew that a couple of monks took a direct hit from the shelling. Piseth’s wife got a hand full of black dirt and began spreading it on their head and chanting Buddhist verses…may the soil protect us from bomb….Again, a scene of chaos….screaming….yelling and faces streaming with blood….one could only compare this scene of human desperation to a scene from the movie “Platoon.”

Piseth broke down and cried while lying down on the ground. Piseth’s wife and daughter started running, but they immediately stopped because another bomb exploded about fifty feet from them. A scene of helplessness and desperation with voices screaming for help……but he was unable to do very much. Piseth tended to his frightened wife and his daughter who was lightly wounded by shrapnel to her left leg.

To be continued to Chapter 4...

Friday, December 24, 2010

Ch. 1: First Trip Home

Thoughts, feelings and emotions that hopefully provoke the purest of minds...Capturing thoughts through written words is like capturing pictures on film or digital camera.

Chapter 1 ”First Trip Home” (The Betrayal)

Piseth wanted to go back to Southeast Asia to explore and to better understand the roots of Cambodia's history. He grew up not knowing what actually happened in a land once called “Khmer Empire” and once described by many world travelers as “Venice of the East”.

Piseth still remembers his huge mansion once stood tall in a quiet neighborhood, situated in a provincial town called Batdombang near the Thai-Cambodian borders. He remembers those days when his father returns from his military mission with entourage of his men, dressed in military uniforms with goodies, exotic foods and so much fanfare. Piseth remembers being picked up by his aunties and uncles in a military Jeep to go to the movies and boxing matches in the so called Olympic Stadium located in the heart of the city. Piseth came from a well-to-do family and had everything a little boy could ever wish for. Life was beautiful and peaceful then; especially before the civil war broke out in 1975.

With the fall of democratic government into the hands of the communist; Piseth’s family was forced to leave everything behind. They were evacuated along many other city dwellers to the collective farms about 15 kilometers in the rural areas.

Life under the communists was harsh. Piseth was recruited to join the Youth Movement and trained as a spy at the age of eleven years old. But for Piseth it was a unique and brainwashing experience.

Under the Communist rule, Piseth was separated from his parents and other three younger siblings because he was considered an elite group of “trainable youth”. He was allowed to return home only after 3 years when the Communists were forcibly driven out by the Vietnamese invading forces. To many Southeast Asian scholars, Vietnamese invasion of Cambodia in late 1978 came a little too late where three million lives already lost resulted from starvation, forced labor, execution and diseases in just little over three years under the reign of terror; the Communist Khmer Rouge.

During the Vietnamese occupation, Piseth’s family like many other Cambodians continued to endure hardship. Many people thought that the communist Khmer Rouge was cruel and inhumane; but life was becoming unbearable. Vietnamese occupation did not seem to end the misfortunes and hardships. Whilst lives were sparred; the Vietnamese occupation became harsher for Piseth’s father. He was recruited into the military to fight alongside the Vietnamese to kill his own people. Many of the younger men were forcibly taken into military camps whilst the young women left behind were raped by the Vietnamese occupying forces.

It was in the fall of 1978 that Piseth’s family decided to escape Cambodia to Thailand in search of better life. A confused young man with torments written all over his face resulted by ongoing conflicts and wars. Piseth’s family finally arrived in the United States of America in 1983.

In 1992, Piseth applied and won a six month long scholarship from his university in collaboration with Chicago Institute of Asian Studies to go to Southeast Asia to study Southeast Asian politics, culture, regional security and economy. The Southeast Asian scholarship program incorporates 4 countries which includes; Singapore, Indonesia, Malaysia and Thailand where students were given the opportunities to immerse in the Asian cultures by staying with a host family whilst conducting their research.

Whilst in Thailand, Piseth ceases the opportunity to travel to a border town called Aranyaprathet, which was at Thai and Cambodian borders and fairly in close proximity to Batdombang province where Piseth was originally from.

Piseth was compelled to see Cambodia first hand after so many years away. He risked his life crossing in to the Cambodia’s side of the border illegally. His heartfelt emotions forced him to make his way in to the land despising the laws and ignoring the facts that he may get himself in to serious immigration trouble if he was caught.

Setting foot inside this once-bountiful land, the sight and smell of the terra tore him up inside. The devastating effects of war were shocking. It was like a thousand saws churning, cutting Piseth with no sense of remorse.

The scene of young children covered with mud and black dirt was dreadful. Their hair was grisly brown and caught the sunrays, making them appeared like animals condemned to eternal hell. Some lacked limbs, and others could barely walk, begging for foods along the highway connecting the small village of Poipet to Batdombang.

At first glance, everything seemed very foreign to him. Piseth thought they were nothing more than a delusion. The emotional feelings were difficult to put into words. The sight of such poverty filled him with shame for Piseth’s own lifestyle in America. He was torn with disbelief and anger over the leaders who made their lives so miserable. But he felt an altruism and compassion toward these, his people.

Hitching a ride on an oxcart and motorcycle taxi, Piseth finally made it to his hometown, Batdombang. Piseth kept asking himself whether he was actually in his own home. He stayed in Batdombang province visiting long-lost relatives for two days before coming back to Bangkok for his midterm exams.

On the second trip, he decided to fly into Phnom Penh for the very first time. He wanted to see for himself what the capital city was like and to conduct some personal business.

Absurd as it may sound, Piseth decided to go in disguise as a poor local because he did not want anybody to know that he was from the United States. In preparations, he packed lightly, masking the material wealth of Piseth’s western lifestyle.

Piseth then dressed up in ragged clothes bought at a Thai thrift store, wrapped his neck with an old krama– scarf normally worn by farmers. In a good Samaritan spirit, Piseth bought four cases of school supplies to donate to the local school children.

The plane departed from Bangkok International Airport at 2:30 p.m. and was expected to arrive an hour later at Phnom Penh International Airport. As the plane was cruising in the open sky, the scene seemed very serene and peaceful. Half an hour after takeoff, the captain announced that the plane would be approaching Phnom Penh International shortly.

Piseth’s heart trembled in excitement to see Phnom Penh. He took a deep breath as he suddenly saw the land and city from a distance. A scene of vast land with virtually no development appeared as the plane descended from its cruising altitude. There were a few roads here and there; huts and straw houses were briefly visible as the plane circled in a holding pattern waiting for its turn to land.

Piseth’s heart beat faster and faster with mixed emotions, expecting the worst. As the plane was on its final approach, he began unknowingly to shed tears. He refrained from bursting into insanity, but the appalling view in Piseth’s eyes chilled him to sympathy. Moreover, it obliged him to feel a sense of the many histories in this land once called ``Khmer Empire''. He had never felt such strong feelings of patriotism in his entire life.

Oops! he was of course in another world when one of the flight attendants gently tapped him on the back, informing him that he was the only person left on the plane. He went through the security checkpoint but suddenly ran into problems with the corrupt local police who tried to overcharge him and extort money. He managed to talk his way out of it and proceeded to the airport exit, but did not know where to go. Confused and a bit startled, he asked a guy on a Cyclo to show him the city before he would try to find his uncle's house. For the next five hours Piseth circled the city and began to understand its character. Piseth spent about six days touring the capital city, Phnom Penh, on foot, seeing everything from the Royal Palace to Psar Thmey, and slump dwellings.

Traveling and chatting with the local Cambodians was the best part of Piseth’s trip. He learned a great deal about himself and his identity. The warm receptions made him feel a sense of solidarity. Meanwhile, listening to farmers in Kampong Chhnang talked about their aspirations and visions for freedom and democracy made him feel a sense of rage toward those who deprived them of these basic rights. For example, they wished they had the freedom to farm in rice fields free of harassment from the rich and powerful elites.

On another occasion, he talked with homeless young men from Svay Rieng province who slept on the pavement of the Victory Monument about their hope in the future. He became infuriated at their helpless conditions. The young men expressed hardships due to their inability to sow crops. They had migrated to the capital city, and they told stories of starvation, survival and perseverance. Vivid tales of the human realities within the home he once shared forced him to become aware of the harsh conditions.

During Piseth’s stay in Cambodia, he often thought of how we always take things for granted here in the United States. How can we spare just a few of those luxury things for our fellow brothers and sisters? The realities of the problem appeared to lie within so many complexities, yet he begins to understand some of them. The great task lies before us, the future generations.

For him the issues of Khmer are always on Piseth’s mind. The faces of hunger, the handicapped, the sick, the impoverished and the freedom fighters will always be captured in Piseth’s conscience. He left this homeland of his once again in tears. A feeling of guilt enraged him for not being able to stay and help with the process of reconstruction. Moreover, Piseth left with heartbreaking emotions, thinking of those who were once again tormented with the injustices and the slow process of reconstruction.

Sunday, December 19, 2010

Raining...Missing Home!!

Thoughts, feelings and emotions that hopefully provoke the purest of minds...Capturing thoughts through written words is like capturing pictures on film or digital camera.

It has been raining during the last four days and has not stopped. This continuous rainfalls are some what strange to me because I have not experienced it before. This bountiful lands filled with so much fruit plantations; grape, persimmon, plum, orange, cheery, and strawberry do need quite abit of rains. But why so much? It is expected that this whole week will be raining non-stop until the end of the week.

When I am faced with gloomy weather, cold wind, dark cloud...I think about nothing else but home. Home is where my heart is..It will forever be. Nothing more and nothing less.

I remember those younger days; when it rains, my older brother would take me out to catch frogs, farm crabs and fish that were just abundant and every where.

If I tell children now about those days, they will find it hard to believe that I can catch fish, frogs and crabs by just walking outside of the house. In less than 30 minutes, we were able to catch enough for the family and enough to sell to the market.

I wonder whether it is still like this? I wonder whether I would be able to catch such frogs, crabs and fish like I used to where the lands were free of chemical, pesticides, fertilizers and such?

It has been raining for the last three days in the valley...I am feeling very homesick and could only have imagined those days where we would be out with our flashlights hunting for snakes and other critters. The sound of frogs croaking and crickets singing after rain make me feel like I want to turn back time.

I remember those cold nights after the rain, we would be wrapped in our blankets sitting by the bond fire under our wooden home that had been standing there close to two generations. In the midst of the drizzling rains, noodle cart would be crossing through. It costs less than a nickel to buy the mobile kuy teov. I can tell you, nothing is better than kuy teov when you are cold and shivering. Then the fresh catch of frogs roasting in the bond fire with hot rice, hot sauce mixed with young mango, for sure made the night closer to heaven.

Those were the days, I shall remember them for the rest of my life. Our lives were nothing but full of simplicity. Our livelihood was much depended on how much we were able to grow. Vegetables were all around. Livestocks were just enough. We did not have to think much about gas nor electricity because woods were our natural sources of energy.

The night would be lit with candle lights. For those that wanted more, car batteries were readily available to power televisions, fans, and other basic electronic items around the house. And they were cheap to recharge.

Our ways of life was simplistic yet comforting. I wonder whether I want time to be frozen so that things would be the same? For I know that development has taken all of us by surprise; but the prices that we have to pay for are much higher as well.

I am yet ready to comprehend whether or not development is in favor of humanities? But I know it is a modern phenomenon that is widespread and unstoppable. I could only wish that development will be for the good of humanities and not a destruction of it.

Wednesday, December 15, 2010

The History of Christmas

Thoughts, feelings and emotions that hopefully provoke the purest of minds...Capturing thoughts through written words is like capturing pictures on film or digital camera.


The history of Christmas dates back over 4,000 years. Many of our Christmas traditions were celebrated centuries before the Christ child was born. The 12 days of Christmas, the bright fires, the yule log, the giving of gifts, carnivals(parades) with floats, carolers who sing while going from house to house, the holiday feasts, and the church processions can all be traced back to the early Mesopotamians.

Many of these traditions began with the Mesopotamian celebration of New Years. The Mesopotamians believed in many gods, and as their chief god - Marduk. Each year as winter arrived it was believed that Marduk would do battle with the monsters of chaos. To assist Marduk in his struggle the Mesopotamians held a festival for the New Year. This was Zagmuk, the New Year's festival that lasted for 12 days.

The Mesopotamian king would return to the temple of Marduk and swear his faithfulness to the god. The traditions called for the king to die at the end of the year and to return with Marduk to battle at his side.

To spare their king, the Mesopotamians used the idea of a "mock" king. A criminal was chosen and dressed in royal clothes. He was given all the respect and privileges of a real king. At the end of the celebration the "mock" king was stripped of the royal clothes and slain, sparing the life of the real king.

The Persians and the Babylonians celebrated a similar festival called the Sacaea. Part of that celebration included the exchanging of places, the slaves would become the masters and the masters were to obey.

Early Europeans believed in evil spirits, witches, ghosts and trolls. As the Winter Solstice approached, with its long cold nights and short days, many people feared the sun would not return. Special rituals and celebrations were held to welcome back the sun.

In Scandinavia during the winter months the sun would disappear for many days. After thirty-five days scouts would be sent to the mountain tops to look for the return of the sun. When the first light was seen the scouts would return with the good news. A great festival would be held, called the Yuletide, and a special feast would be served around a fire burning with the Yule log. Great bonfires would also be lit to celebrate the return of the sun. In some areas people would tie apples to branches of trees to remind themselves that spring and summer would return.

The ancient Greeks held a festival similar to that of the Zagmuk/Sacaea festivals to assist their god Kronos who would battle the god Zeus and his Titans.

The Roman's celebrated their god Saturn. Their festival was called Saturnalia which began the middle of December and ended January 1st. With cries of "Jo Saturnalia!" the celebration would include masquerades in the streets, big festive meals, visiting friends, and the exchange of good-luck gifts called Strenae (lucky fruits).

The Romans decked their halls with garlands of laurel and green trees lit with candles. Again the masters and slaves would exchange places

"Jo Saturnalia!" was a fun and festive time for the Romans, but the Christians though it an abomination to honor the pagan god. The early Christians wanted to keep the birthday of their Christ child a solemn and religious holiday, not one of cheer and merriment as was the pagan Saturnalia.

But as Christianity spread they were alarmed by the continuing celebration of pagan customs and Saturnalia among their converts. At first the Church forbid this kind of celebration. But it was to no avail. Eventually it was decided that the celebration would be tamed and made into a celebration fit for the Christian Son of God.

Some legends claim that the Christian "Christmas" celebration was invented to compete against the pagan celebrations of December. The 25th was not only sacred to the Romans but also the Persians whose religion Mithraism was one of Christianity's main rivals at that time. The Church eventually was successful in taking the merriment, lights, and gifts from the Saturanilia festival and bringing them to the celebration of Christmas.

The exact day of the Christ child's birth has never been pinpointed. Traditions say that it has been celebrated since the year 98 AD. In 137 AD the Bishop of Rome ordered the birthday of the Christ Child celebrated as a solemn feast. In 350 AD another Bishop of Rome, Julius I, choose December 25th as the observance of Christmas.

Returning Your Love - Poetic Justice

Thoughts, feelings and emotions that hopefully provoke the purest of minds...Capturing thoughts through written words is like capturing pictures on film or digital camera.


The lamenting of the night trembles, telling me of my lover's sorrow...

Serenading my beloved through the sound of my guitar hoping that she will grasp the intrinsic nature of my love for her...

But each day, my heart is being tenderly mused by another keeper... And she does not know it?

My sweety! I ask of you to steer your feelings away from me...

Darling, I know all along that you will respond with sincerity..

For you are a bright lady, please try to understand with a little bit of compassion...

I am telling you now that I don't want to see your enduring pain...

Due to circumstances and of many reasons, our love has gone astray like this...

I am sending my best regards. In sum, returning your heart, my dearest...Please forgive me!

We were not meant to be. Even endless yearning will not bring our days together...

As beautiful as you are, you will not have difficulty finding a gentleman of your dreams..

Please my dearest, stop regretting...It is time for you to pick new flower and seek new pasture that may be greener...

From the purest of my heart, I am much of the same as other men...wanting nothing less than beautiful of a life...

My sweet; I thank you for your love in life and I shall cherish those memories...

Fate is not on my side now. I only ask of you to forgive and to forget...

Again, I want to let you know that I am returning your heart back to you, my dearest.

We were never meant to be...Best wishes to you and forever more..

Monday, December 13, 2010

Making Time for a Relationship is Best!

Thoughts, feelings and emotions that hopefully provoke the purest of minds...Capturing thoughts through written words is like capturing pictures on film or digital camera.


Sometimes in our busy lives the really important things can be forgotten. Other people, their habits and their needs may even feel annoying while we are pursuing our material needs.

We may feel our relationships lack something. We are not as happy as we originally planned and wanted to be with the people in our lives. We may stand there, wondering what happened to our relationships.

When did our relationships become so burdensome to us? Where did the joy and happiness go? What happened to us being happy together?

If all people suddenly disappeared we would understand that to be really happy - we need other people.

Being alone can be so sweet at times, and is certainly even necessary. But if there really was no one else around, we would begin to miss the company of others in no time. And just as it is with any other important things: We need to work on being happy together.

Every relationship gives back what we give into it. And I am sure deep within we all want our relationships to be nurturing and happy.

We need a simple plan. Happy together - that´s the name of the game. We need to look at our relationships like they were plants in a garden. Each plant needs watering, care, weeding, sunshine and yes - rain too.

We need to realize that relationships are often neglected because of our own choices - we choose how we want spend our time and while we are living those other plans, a phone call from a friend may feel like an interruption. We feel annoyed even. "Why does she have to call just now?"

In our hurry we may forget how very important other people are to us - and we to them.

We all face hardships in our lives and when this happens, we sure appreciate those people who care about us and open their arms to hold us when the need arises.

As my father used to tell me; ‘many people want to ride the car with you; but how many people want to ride an oxcart with you when the car breaks down?’..

You know who those people are? They are our family. They are our friends. Make time for them during the holidays...

Wednesday, December 8, 2010

Feelings of Lost Love...

Thoughts, feelings and emotions that hopefully provoke the purest of minds...Capturing thoughts through written words is like capturing pictures on film or digital camera.


Dearest Angel,

I remembered the day we met. It was that summer night filled with so much joy. You had your beautiful red dress, sparkled eyes and that smile that captivated me beyond my wildest dreams.

We started out as friends; then our love was inseparable. We broke all traditional rules because our love was so strong. You were eighteen then but you had the maturity of woman that I have always dreamed of. My heart sunk because I could only have wished that we belong together forever.

Angel, years have passed. I have always dreamed about you in my wildest dreams. I have been gone far and away from you; yet not knowing when I will be able to return to you once more.
My heart torn from not being able to tell you in person on how I have felt and why I had to leave you.

I cried a million tears and filled with so much remorse of what I had done. I questioned myself on why things are they way they are in life; yet I come to no real conclusion; only succumbed to feelings of hopelessness and despairs.

Angel, I have not betrayed our love; but circumstances separated us. I yearn for you each and every day. And there is not a single day that goes by that I don’t think about you. You are my sweet and innocent Angel.

My days are long yet the picture of your lovely face and that adorable smile excites me to laugh in lonely tears. How and when we can meet again? Is there such thing as miracle in life? Can two broken hearts be healed? Will time be a test of our patience and a testament of our true love for one another?

Angel, I could only have wished that day is near. I want to hold you close in my arms. I want to see your smile again and feel those tenderly touch.

I want to turn back time to those memorable moments where we took a quiet ride across the Japanese bridge giggling about the birthday cake that got on to your nose. Those windy days in Kampong Cham looking across Tonle Bet, imagining how our lives will be, nothing less than beautiful. Those sentimental moments on a hammock whispering our words of love; nothing less than sweet joy.

We were on top of our own world then….Our lust and love were so strong. And we were just inseparable.

Why does our journey through life be so cruel, neglecting those happy times together? Why does true love always filled with so many obstacles? Yet, I cannot find any real conclusion. Maybe, as they say, love is nothing more than those moments that we cherished together. Can it ever be everlasting, I wonder? Yet, as they say, it is what you make of it.

We may have parted and those happy days may have gone; yet my love for you is still strong. Time has taught me to be resilience and to be patience in my resolve to find peace in my soul.

I have not conquered the fear of losing you. Yet I know that if I do, it is not me; but you, who will have made that decision. Will you ever forgive me for what I have done to you, I have always wondered?

As I contemplate on the days ahead, I have nothing but emptiness in my soul. I yearn for nothing more than a second chance in life that happy times will be everlasting. Yet I doubt those days will ever come; but I have always been a dreamer. I am filled with nothing more than optimism that one day the dark cloud hovering over me will be yielding. Henceforth, I will be forgiven for my sins in life.

For now, I could only pray each night that our father art thou in heaven will have mercy upon me. For he knows that I am nothing more than a man that have erred and that I am nowhere close to perfection of a man he expects me to be. I am who I am, Johnny Chuon.

Tuesday, December 7, 2010

You Never Know...One Day..You May Just Run into an Angel..!!

Thoughts, feelings and emotions that hopefully provoke the purest of minds...Capturing thoughts through written words is like capturing pictures on film or digital camera.


There was this little girl sitting by herself in the park. Everyone passed by her and never stopped to see why she looked so sad. Dressed in a worn pink dress, barefoot and dirty, the girl just sat and watched the people go by. She never tried to speak. She never said a word. Many people passed by her, but no one would stop.

The next day I decided to go back to the park in curiosity to see if the little girl would still be there. Yes, she was there, right in the very spot where she was yesterday, and still with the same sad look in her eyes.

Today I was to make my own move and walk over to the little girl. For as we all know, a park full of strange people is not a place for young children to play alone. As I got closer I could see the back of the little girl's dress was grotesquely shaped. I figured that was the reason people just passed by and made no effort to speak to her.

As I got closer, the little girl lowered her eyes slightly to avoid my intent stare. As I approached her, I could see the shape of her back more clearly. She was grotesquely shaped in a humped-over form.

I smiled to let her know it was OK; I was there to help, to talk. I sat down beside her and opened with a simple, "Hello." The little girl acted shocked, and stammered a "hi," after a long stare into my eyes. I smiled and she shyly smiled back.

We talked until darkness fell and the park was completely empty. I asked the girl why she was so sad. The little girl looked at me with a sad face said, "Because I'm different." I immediately said, "That you are!" and smiled. The little girl acted even sadder and said, "I know."

"Little girl," I said, "you remind me of an angel, sweet and innocent." She looked at me and smiled, then slowly she got to her feet and said, "Really?"

"Yes, you're like a little Guardian Angel sent to watch over all those people walking by." She nodded her head yes, and smiled. With that she opened the back of her pink dress and allowed her wings to spread, then she said "I am. I'm your Guardian Angel," with a twinkle in her eye. I was speechless -- sure I was seeing things.

She said, "For once you thought of someone other than yourself. My job here is done."
I got to my feet and said, "Wait, why did no one stop to help an angel?" She looked at me, smiled, and said, "You are the only one that could see me," and then she was gone.

And with that, my life was changed dramatically. So, when you think you're all you have, remember, your angel is always watching over you.