Just Another Day In Paradise

Life is never boring...some days, I find myself faced with the most daunting tasks; yet I strive to be my very best at all times.  


For I know that, life's worst failure is not trying...


I am living in an ever changing time....it is a time for me to be resolved...I shall keep my head high, think through all possible scenarios and solutions.  


I shall seek for clarifications when in doubt.
I shall ask for advices and ask for second opinions when required.
I shall take risks and go beyond my usual boundaries to rediscover myself.
I shall fight for what I believe to be the guiding truth.
I shall not fear the unknown because it is a source of my weakness.
I shall follow my passion in whatever I do for the remainder of my life in this world.
I shall find my weaknesses and overcome them.
I shall build on my strengths for they will be the forces to achieving my destinty.
I shall rediscover my faith in god; for I know that I will be forgiven.
I shall serve him for the goodness of humanities.


For these, life is never boring.  I will follow the truth until the end of time.

Another Experience to Share the World--My Anguish Thoughts!!

Thank you for your support and your interests in OCA and its fate.  As all of you probably have heard, not much of positive things about me.  This memo is my attempt to give all of you some ideas about the internal struggles that have occured during my last two years of volunteeing which transgressed  to an eventual dilemma. I feel personally responsible for what happened to OCA.  But I also feel that the governing boards are equally accountable for what had happened.

What happened at OCA recently transpired a coup that had been planned for at least a year.  I knew that it was coming; but I kept on despite the fact that I have expressed interest in resigning from volunteer post nine months ago due to the lack of support and irreconciliable differences in terms of vision. 

I was frustrated over a non-realistic vision of building expansion and capital campaign to pay off the loan.  In the midst of economic down turn and state budget cuts; many influential boards voted to go ahead with capital campaign.  I chose not to fight and went with the plan.  A capital campaign to raise $2.6 mil to pay off the building in the midst of budget reduction for services and programs....It was unrealistic.  The boards were charged with the tasks making business and government contacts and I was charged to follow up with funding proposals and the rest.  Three months into the process; one board came to me with one business contact.  How in the world is one going to raise $2.6 mil after the economic crisis.  Not impossible, but collective works must be mobilized.

Political meeting was another major clash.  When I took office, I amended some policies regarding political meetings to be held at OCA.  We are a non-profit and non-political entity.  Thus, I did what I considered sensible by enforcing the rule that political meetings are allowed only with the condition that they get prior approval and applicants must put down a $100 deposit for property damage (refundable) and $20 for space rental.  It was only fair because we need a custodian to be around and clean after the meeting.  Some influential members of the community and boards found my ideas to be irrational and took them as personal attack.  It was quite a feud and took long time to heal....

OCA's chairs stolen by an influential figure's daughter and a self-proclaimed founder of OCA in a broad day light got quite a heat from me.  Another upseting episode for the family...After all, it was run like a family affair, I am just a new kid on the block.

That particular incidence sparked an interest for the family to challenge me by way of becoming a board.  With much controversy, the boards, loss by one vote decided to not allow this individual to become board....another fuel tossed into the fire...

A loyal and trusted individual and an insider who was the hope of the family for eventual victory was charged with sexual harrasement by a client he served.  The complaint was raised by County for OCA to take immediate action.  I did what was right to get OCA out of lawsuit.  The person was terminated with proper legal consultation.  It was the biggest embarrassment because the individual was a pioneer and has served OCA for than 20 years. He was the candidate that the family had favored for the executive director's position over me during the selection process.  I was rediculed for siding with women.  It was the straw that broke the camel's back.

As you can see....there were many strange and odd things that happened.  I was not able to do enough in terms of getting people on my side because I refused to do what was considered wrong.  I challenged the terms and limitations of board membership and only to be met with retaliation and vegeance.

Well, enough said....I look forward to live in peace.  For once in two years, I have fell so much weigh lifted off my shoulders.  

Thank you for listening.

Our Future in the Midst of Chaos and Destruction--What to do?

Imagine a world that is ruled not by the rules of laws; but by who you know, your affiliation, how much money you possess, nepotism and corruption. It is a world in no doubt very difficult to live in, but how do we, as citizens of this oppressed generation change our destiny and shape it so that it becomes a better world for ourselves and our future generations.

It is once said that changes start within ourselves. If this generation is to be a change agent for future generations; we must act now.

Look at yourself in the mirror; what do you see? What do you represent?
From what background do you come from? How much money do you have?
Are your parents connected with the ruling elites or business in-crowd?
Who are your cousins, friends, associates? What kind of education do you have?

Do you have a stance on issues affecting you, environments, others, women, gender, equality, corruption, justice and socio-political ideals?

What kind of influence can you make?
What kind of decisions should you make regarding jobs, personal wealth, comfort level?

We know that making and impacting change on a grand scale is nearly impossible. So, we must look at how we can make small changes within each one of us; so that collectively, grandiose changes will be possible.

We are all creatures of habits imposed by our surroundings. Whether you are rich, poor, powerful, powerless, King and Queen, Prince, Princess, noble, single, married, educated or not...Ultimately, we are all humans, nothing more.

We wake up every morning wanting to be loved, cared for, listened to, appreciated for our thoughts and actions. Those that are in places of power are more of creatures of their own deception because they live in a world where natural things are manipulated to meet their needs and wants of how they want to see things.

Henceforth, how do we as individual makes or influences change in this chaotic world of which will run our course of history to despairs again if we do not choose to shape it NOW?

Ask yourself, my role in my own family, my friends, community and the world at large?  Who Am I?  What can I do to make changes or influence change?

Do I speak my mind at dinner table with my own family?  Do I question when things are not correctively done?  Do I care about other people who has less than what I have?  Do I care for people that are being oppressed for all sort of reasons? Do I wonder and question why certain decisions are made by those in power?  Do I question how money and finances are made within my family circle?  Do I question why I am privileged where others are not?

Looking and learning about ourselves will enable us to understand why things are the way they are and how we can go about making baby steps to making changes.

Changes are never easy...nobody in this world welcomes change if it is not in their favor.  Knowing that, we must strive to look for ALTERNATIVE SOLUTIONS so that changes can be ever lasting.  If changes are proposed without examining the alternative solutions; they are only temporary...because at the end of the day, we are creatures of habits....Habits get repeated over and over again because they provide COMFORT.

Examples of what I can do if I am in the position to make or influence change:

Scenario 1:
My father is a school administrator at the Ministry of Education, his source of income is from his basic government salary.  Many opportunities to be corrupted and earn extra incomes.  I am the oldest in the family and I have done well in school with some help from my parents.  I am respected by both of my parents for my hard works and being an obedient child.  I am in an important role because I know how my father is making his salary to feed and provides for every thing that I and my family need through corrupted practices.  My father has been doing this for the last 20 years and he never felt that it was the wrong thing to do because everybody is involved. My father has more than enough for our family and himself.  I want my father to live in peace and happiness without having to involved himself with selling answers at exams and taking money from those rich kids who do not want to go to school.

Scenario 2:  
I love to go out with my friends to bars, night clubs, massage parlor, KTV to enjoy ourselves.  My friends and I love to get the girls drunk and pick up them up for sexual pleasure because it just a fun thing to do because it is cheap and widely accessible.  I and my friends typically do not like to wear condom because it does not feel right and does not give us the sensitivity we need.  I drive and pay for my friends when we go out and do all of those fun things.  I think that we are going in the wrong track.  I am aware of the consequences of AIDS, long term impacts to the girls with their lives living with liver diseases from excessive alcohol and future of Khmer children.  I know that I am  involved in the corrupted practices at the Custom Office where I am working at because I need the money for my family, my mistresses and to support these scrupulous activities.

Scenario 3:
His Excellency Sophal Sok, is a very high ranking official in the Ministry of Interior.  He has authorities to decide on many critical things related to security and national interest.  I have a very close personal relationship with his daughter and his wife.  His Excellency Sok respects me because I have won a full scholarship to study in Thailand for my Masters degree.  HE Sok is in charge of mobilizing troops to evict the residents living near Beoungkok lake because the Chinese are filling up the lake to make ways for condos and homes. I happen to be with HE Sok's family at a family farm where they come to relax and overheard the conversations.  Chumteav Sok asks me for my opinion about what to do with these residents who will eventually be homeless?  Futhermore, Chumteav Sok also asks me on the potential impact of the filling of the lake?

Scenario 4:
I am a good friend of HE Sok An's son who has tremendous power and influences as the government's manager.  Sophearith is a good son, but much closer to his mother than his father because his father is always busy with the government affairs.  HE. Sok An listens to his wife more than to his advisers.  The Private Sector Forum now demands answers as to why the sewage problems in Cambodia have not been resolved because much money have been donated with international donors and development agencies.  HE Sok An is under tremendous pressure from the PM to rectify the situation, but he is also aware that some agencies involved are not doing what they are supposed to be doing.  HE. Sok An wants to protect these agencies and I am at a dinner table with HE Sok An's family and asked for my opinion about the situation?

I know that most of us are in similar situations and scenarios; it is up to us to take that baby steps to speak our mind.  It is difficult and has to be done in ways where the receivers must understand that we are providing alternative solutions.  Changes are much more difficult when faced with NEGATIVE CRITICISMS.  So the approach must be positive with much care.  Subtle yet clear and concise.  Leave necessary spaces for the receivers to decide and counter his arguments.  Our job is to provide ALTERNATIVE SOLUTIONS that are constructive and for the betterment of future generations and the human race.

Written by Johnny C. (RN International@2010)

23 Things About Men That Women Ought to Know

1.   Men are NOT mind readers.
2.  Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it that way.
3.  Crying is blackmail.
4.  Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one: Subtle hints do not work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work! Just say it!
5.  Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question. 
6.  Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.  
7.  A headache that lasts for 17 months is a Problem. See a doctor. 
8.  Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.  
9.  If you won't dress like the Victoria 's Secret girls, don't Expect us to act like soap opera guys. 
10.  If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us. *
11.  If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one
12.  You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.  
13.  Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials.  
14.  Jayaraman VII did NOT need directions and neither do we.  
15.  ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings. Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.  
16.  If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.
17.  If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer you don't want to hear.  
18.  When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine. Really .  
19.  Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as footballl, the shotgun formation, or golf.  
20.  You have enough clothes.
21.  You have too many shoes.  
22.  I am in shape. Round IS a shape!  
23.  Thank you for reading this.


(Adapted from Research and Blog in the Gleez)  -  Johnny

The Power of Choice

It’s a good inspiration for us all. It is great to be alive!


The Power of Choice is Real. We can . . .


Choose to LOVE--rather than hate.


Choose to SMILE--rather than frown.


Choose to BUILD--rather than destroy.


Choose to PERSEVERE--rather than quit.


Choose to PRAISE--rather than gossip.


Choose to HEAL--rather than wound.


Choose to GIVE--rather than grasp.


Choose to ACT--rather than delay.


Choose to PRAY--rather than despair.


Choose to FORGIVE--rather than curse.


Each day brings a new opportunity to choose. What kind of choices will you make today?

Is Life Without Love, Life At All?

What kind of love are we talking about?

That is life without a partner, without a one-on-one romantic love and relationship. The answer to that is yes, life is life and worthwhile regardless of whether one ever has a romantic relationship.

But many people these days seem to think that their lives can't be "complete" or satisfying unless they have romantic love. This is actually backwards: as long as someone feels their quality of life depends on another person, they can never know true happiness or satisfaction... or love.

There are many kinds of love, and the most important is self-love. Until and unless you love yourself, you can't experience much more than pale glimpses of what love, ANY kind of love, is all about. And self-love is a natural part of human existence, so everyone has that ability, although in modern times it's often NOT easy to develop.

We all experience love of many kinds in our lives. I'm not sure it would be possible to NOT experience it, unless there was brain damage. Even the most seriously emotionally traumatized people can still experience love of one kind or there is no love in your life, there is... you just have to learn to recognize it.

So, in short Life Without Love is LIFE after all...Henceforth, learn how to love yourself, then love others...

Hello Ladies and Gents, Wake Up Republicans!

Isn’t it about time that we realized what the Republican has done to America during the last 8 years. Enough is enough...another war, devastation and ecomonic chaos with no end in sight....Come on, wake up and let's us all smell the fresh air!!!

Ladies and gents:

Mainstream Americans will vote for Obama and I also casted my ballot because we need to be resolved in our conviction to shape the destiny of our children's future.

There are many Cambodian Americans who are fed up with the Republican's failure to keep America safe and economically sound; hence to imply all Cambodian
Americans favor McCain is utterly ludicrous because the belief that Republicans will side with Cambodia's destiny is a homeland dream (not a reality).

Ladies and Gents:

Our differences are what makes Americans great and the respect for those
differences is what shapes our American democracy today and years to come.

Vote for a better world where Arabs, Jews, Asians, and all alike can live in peace in harmony. Vote for a better economic promises and vote for change in attitudes of how we view others different from our own.

The water is stale my friends, let us savor a greener pasture ahead of us the next four
years....Vote your conscience!!! The time has come for change and let us be a part of HISTORY together.....

A Toilet of Experience

After my graduation from Stanford University, I was soul searching and looking for ways to return to the mother land.  Finally after many rigorous interviews, I had two job offers with a tobacco company and also as volunteer for the USAID program. 

 Finally, I decided to take up the post with USAID program as a volunteer, a US funding agency in Cambodia’s reconstruction efforts.  By mid September 2002, preparations were made for the home coming.  My parents were very reluctant in approving the idea of working in the mother land.  They feel neither safe nor they feel that the place for stable enough for their young son to be in.  It was after all, my second time to the mother land after three years.  Soon after my arrival and induction, I was attached to the Ministry of Environment as a special liason in charge of proposal writing and training in the department of planning. My experience with the Ministry of Planning was short lived.  

I was extremely enthusiastic about working in the Ministry of Environment.  The first day of work, I got up at three o'clock in the morning planning and rehearsing what I should say and do when I got to the office.   As a rookie, I did not know what to expect.  There were many things that were going through my mind.  I was feeling overjoyed and excited just for the mere fact that I was offered an opportunity to work for a Cambodian government and will be surrounded by own kind. 

I got to the office at seven o'clock in the morning and was introduced by my coordinator to a gentleman by the name of Dr. Vutha, planning department chief of staff.  Dr. Vutha was to be my immediate supervisor.  A sense of friendship was established soon after the 15 minutes of personal introduction.  My initial reaction was that Dr. Vutha was a man of respect.  

The first week gone by like a gentle wind and I continued to feel a sense of enthusiasm, pride and a sense of belonging.  For me, it was a chance of a life time and a dream come true.  I had never thought that I would be able to come back and actually work in Cambodia.  Feeling of joy filled my heart with simple opportunities like teaching basic conversational English to my co-workers or assist others with translations.  In my heart, I am finally home working for a good cause for the mother land.  

During my second week, I thought about making some changes in the department.  The number one priority on my agenda was to get the bathroom cleansed.  In my department, there were 42 people to one bathroom.  

The deplorable smell of the dirty bathroom generated by the humidity and an extreme heat got to me after the second day in the office.  Unfortunately, the frustration forced me to take keen interest in getting the office cleansed. 

Rats and roaches were dominating the bathroom scene with toilet paper cluttered all over the place. Feces lying everywhere and piles of trash scattered beyond imagination.  I was more than determined to clean and sanitize it.  It was a decision that I did hesitate to make because I was not able to come to terms of why people feel comfortable with such an unhealthy environment.  

Running water was no where to be found.  With limited budget in the Ministry, I had to use my own money to buy cleaning materials and detergents for the project in which I considered very dear and a test of my courage.  

The total cost of the cleaning project was just a bit over two hundred dollars.  I did some budgeting before embarking on the project, but did not factor in the unknown variables.  As it turned out, I was cheated by more than half of the total amount by project supervisor that I entrusted to buy much of the materials.  

My first experience and a reality check when asking somebody else to handle your money.  The project outcome was satisfactory but most importantly, the bathroom was clean and useable. 

We collectively agreed to take turn in cleaning the toilet.  The project failed after two months.  I was under the impression that people will take pride in their new bathroom, but as it turned out nobody value the importance of a good toilet. 

I grew tired of using my own money and a part time janitor to try and change a deep rooted behaviors which were difficult to change in a short period of time.  I did not regret from making the decision to not fund the project because after awhile I knew that the people involved were not grateful of having a clean bathroom.  I found out later that most of the staff would leave office after their daily check in.  They did not have to use the bathroom in the building because most of the staff would go home and help with family chores such as working as a motor taxi driver or other second job.  To them, livelihood was more important than any thing else.  I also found out later that an average worker received no more than twenty dollars per month.

There are much to be said about toiletry.  For us, we take thing for granted in America, but for our friends in the motherland, other things had priority.  It was a lesson learned that working overseas requires much patience and a broad understanding of the cultural, economic, and political context.  Things that are seen simple may require a thorough understanding of its complexities before we can attempt to solve them.  To have lasting impact and change are to require much commitment and education.

The toilet experience is a classic example of how many of us come to question the apparent easiness of how things ought to be done.  We are used to seeing Western systems and a working psychology that have been molded by many centuries of trials and errors.  Efficient and effective systems require time and many trials and errors.  

Chapter 11: The Truth Has Yet Revealed (Betrayal)

The turning point came when the housemate revealed what she saw on the night of the incidence. 

When Piseth came home at 2:30am in the morning, he stumbled and felt once then picked himself back up, went straight to his room where Sopheap and Lily were sleeping and crashed onto the bed.  The housemate went on and told Lundi that there were only three people sleeping in the bedroom;  Piseth, Lily and Sopheap.  Charya, the sister-in-law was sleeping next to her in the opposite bedroom but there were no door so she was able to see what was going on.  The housemate did not sleep because of the commotion; she pretended that she was sleeping and so was Charya, the sister-in-law.

After an hour later, the housemate saw Sopheap stepping outside of the bedroom and made a remark in angry tone and said “I have been waiting for this moment”.  Sopheap called to Charya, “What are you waiting for?”  Chakrya by this time was just waiting for the moment.  Immediately, she walked over to Sopheap’s room. 

The housemate was known in the house as a deep sleeper so Sopheap was under the impression that she was dead asleep. Sopheap did not close the door, so what transpired was witnessed by the housemate from a little window under her blanket.   The housemate was witnessing a horrible scheme being committed under the shadow of a small lamp lit in Sopheap’s bedroom. 

Lily was not a deep sleeper but on the night of the incidence, she was drugged with four tables spoons of cough syrup at about 2am, just about more than two hours before the incidence happened.  Lily slept like a log and the housemate can only see that she had slight movements whilst all the commotions happened.

Sopheap instructed Chakrya to take her clothes off and began to masterbate Piseth.  Chakrya at first, was reluctant but was scared of her older sister. 

Piseth, drunk as he was barely moved; but one can only know that when a man is intoxicated; he tends to be much more arouse when his private part is being manipulated.  Piseth was aroused and still was not conscious to know what was happening to him.  On many different occasions, it was Sopheap that would perform such act on him. 

Charya had her clothes off and began to sit on Piseth.  As a young girl, she was not experienced in sexual act.  But with the help of Sopheap, Charya grabbed Piseth’s penis and inserted it into her vagina.  By the sheer force of the penetration, Chakrya screamed lightly because she did not want her sister standing there to be upset. 

Sopheap stood there watching and instructing Chakrya to move up and down so that Piseth can reach ejaculation in time before he was conscious enough to know what had happened.  Soon enough about five times with the up and down motions;  Piseth ejaculated.  Chakrya pulled herself away and was crying profusely. 

Loosing virginity is everything.  Virginity is sacred, yet the sheer greed and feared imposed by her sister made Chakrya commit something beyond her personal and cultural boundaries.

Cambodian women, on the other hand, are expected to remain virgins until marriage. If a woman loses her virginity – even if she is raped – she is considered ‘damaged goods’ and thus, undesirable as a wife.

The housemate watched as these horrific acts unfolded in front of her very eyes; yet she could not say a word.  After the sexual acts, Charya walked out of the room in her sleeping gown and headed to the bathroom as though nothing ever happened. 

Piseth by time was a bit awake yet felt nauseated.  He still did not know what had happened.

Lundi was shocked to learn the truth but he was met with a dilemma because the housemate was Sopheap’s closest cousin and she had been living under Sopheap care for over 4 years and her family depended on Sopheap for support in terms of money and other material things. 

Will the housemate testifies against her own cousin in the court?  That remains to be seen as Lundi tried to gather more circumstantial evidences from Chakrya, the victim.

Mr. Sombath worked tirelessly to build a case for Piseth by trying to get the NGOs to give him access to Chakrya whom the provincial police and the NGOs have taken to a safe house for protection. 

It was difficult for Mr. Sombath because he had been told repeatedly to drop the case because it was politically tied to a lot of funding monies at the national level and if the truth was revealed the NGOs would look bad in front of the government’s eyes and fear of counter suit.

Every evening, Mr. Sombath would get a visit at his home from the immigration police who was tied in their works from funding from the different NGOs.  Likewise, Lundi received numerous phone calls from his colleagues and superiors to stay away from the case.

 Piseth’s parents and relatives who were living in the USA by now learned of his arrest from Reuter Newspaper yet they could confirm.  Piseth’s photos printed in the various newspapers were not clear because he had towel on his head the entire time.  Even if the arrest was confirmed; they could not do much to help him. 

One by one, Piseth’s cousins who were living in Cambodia began to arrive and paid a visit to him at the Battambang Provincial Prison, but there was not much they could do for him. 

They came with foods and water on a daily basis and gotten the chance to catch up with Piseth to give him hope, yet they knew all too well that Piseth will be there for awhile.  On every visit, Piseth amassed himself with toilet paper, bottled water and good foods; yet every time he leaves the visitor’s room; everything was confiscated from him.  What was left and given to him was a single bottled water to take back to his rat hole.

Life has gotten worst for Piseth; he has fallen ill due to the beating and the unsanitary condition of the prison; yet he could not say much but to keep silence.  The complaints that he had made during the US Consulate Officer’s visit on his first day in prison only left him with more beatings from the prison guards and the prison gang. 

Therefore, he dared not speak but only kept to himself and wait for the days to be over.  When will his ordeal be over?  Piseth could only pray that death will come of him so that he did not have to endure such pain and hardship any longer.

Chapter 9: The Cruelty was Unbearable (Betrayal)

Piseth was well-built and very conditioned yet he was no matched with these guys.  They would employ gang style attack on Piseth as experienced on the first few hours when Piseth got to the prison.  The gang would make sure that newcomer succumbed to their rules and not fight back.

Odor from the toilet and human sweat coupled with extreme summer heat and inadequate ventilation made the prison cells a living hell.  It was estimated that about 3 out of 5 inmates were infected by tuberculosis, extreme skin rash or other communicable diseases.

Piseth sat and contemplated on how he will survive living in such a miserable condition.  He dreamed of his wonderful waterbed and large screen TV in a large open space back home.  Life was beyond heaven if he compared to what he was currently going through.  Was it compassion that leads to his down fall or was it just his naivite; Piseth questioned himself?

As he sat and dreamed; Robi the big brother came.  One of Robi’s lieutenants demanded, “Your job is to sit there and use the fan next to you to fan Mr. Robi” He continued..”it is not done until we say so, do you understand?”  By the sheer order, Piseth horriedly grabbed a hold of the makeshift fan made out of palm leaves and started fanning Robi.  The scene was amazingly odd because you had Piseth the size of a goliath fanning a little guy, Robi with both of his feet on Piseth shoulders.  Piseth did not have much choices but one could only guess what was on Piseth’s mind.  The fanning went on for more than four hours until Robi felt asleep then Piseth was told to take a break.

Water was scarce and rationed to only 5 gallons per day in a cell block shared by six inmates.  As a result, Piseth experienced extreme dehydration and would find himself constantly exhausted.  By the first week, Piseth had already loss ten pounds due to the inability to sleep from the heat, odor, mosquito bites, lack of water, and inadequate foods, yet Piseth was still hopeful that some how his family members  and Lundi will find ways to get him out of this misery.

Lundi, Piseth’s best friends had not been to prison since Piseth first got there because he knew that he could not do very much to help Piseth.  For Lundi, he knew full well about the systemic human rights abuses in the prison systems in places such as Cambodia, especially in remote areas such as Battambang.  Lundi also knew that Piseth would have to endure the hardship because he needed to focus on finding ways to help win his release from prison.

Lundi had gotten a hold of a high profile lawyer named Sombath from Battambang that had good reputation for winning cases that were difficult.  When Lundi presented Piseth’s case to the lawyer, he immediately expressed his willingness to help because Lundi was able to share with the lawyer about the nature of the case and how things unfolded thus far.  Mr. Sombath, as an experienced lawyer, he sensed the case had merit and was confident that he could win the case.  For high profile and difficult case like Piseth, Mr. Sombath would normally charge $30,000 to $50,000 dollars; but for Piseth Mr. Sombath was only asking for a deposit of $2,000 to open the case and an additional $3,000 upon winning the case.  

Mr. Sombath was so confident that he could win this case despite the fact that he knew that he had difficult roads ahead of him.  Essentially, Mr. Sombath will have to challenge a criminal case where the accused has already been found guilty in the eyes of seven different NGOs and Institutions that had been led to believe by the evidences from the autopsy and accusations made by Piseth’s wife, his mother-in-law and the victim.  Most importantly, Piseth written confession in front of the three police officers during the interrogation on the night of his arrest. 

How will Mr. Sombath prove that Piseth was innocent and the crime was never committed?  

Chapter 8: Was it a Dream (Betrayal)

The truck carrying Piseth arrived at Battambang Provincial Prison along with a convoy of reporters and other provincial officials.  Piseth was immediately led off the truck with his head covered with a towel and both hands and legs cuffs shackled in chain. 

Reality set in for Piseth.  He has come to the realization that he was ACTUALLY in Prison.  Piseth also knew that he must learn to cope with his new environment until Lundi, his best friend and family can come up with some sort of strategies to secure his release. 

Piseth never lost hope because he knew that he still have time and resources to fight in the court with the help of Lundi and his family.  The bad news was that the accused can be detained in the Provincial Prison up to six months until the court decides his fate.

Piseth was told to strip off his old clothes and replace them with the prison uniform .  From here onwards, Piseth knew that he was no longer a free man. 

Piseth was led to his prison cell by three armed guards. 

Piseth’s body ached from the beating at the interrogation.  He could barely swallow because his face was swollen beyond recognition. 

Piseth was hungry and thirsty because he had not been fed or given food for more than 30 hours.  Piseth was under excruciating pain and mental agitation.  Piseth began to hallucinate about the ordeal.

As Piseth sat in the cell contemplating about his future, he began to hear voices echoing the hallway that it was time to turn off the light.

Inside the prison cell which was approximately 2.5meters by 2.5meters separated from other prison cell by vertical steel bars.  And it was a house to six other inmates.  In the cell, it contained one toilet and 5 gallons of water, no bed, pillow nor mat.  The 6 inmates must learn to co-exist and share water and toilet together. 

The inmates must use the 5 gallons of water for their toilet, for drinking and other washing purposes.  The floor was extremely dirty and infested by ants, cocoroaches and other insects due to the filths that were piling in the four corners.  The odor from the feces and urine was extremely strong that a new comer like Piseth found it most tormenting and unbearable.

Due to the extreme exhaustion from the lack of food, water and beating; Piseth passed out on a pile of rubbish in the corner of the cell without pillow nor blanket.  Piseth had apparently curled into a ball and was dead asleep. 

At about 2am in the morning, Piseth woke up to a pillow strapped on his head. He could barely breath. At first, Piseth thought it was a nightmare, but he could not believe that he was being attacked by his fellow inmates as part of the initiation rite (breaking you down).  Piseth was repeatedly beaten and choked to near death for nearly an hour whilst the crowd cheered on.  Piseth could barely see anybody because his head was covered with pillow and continuously getting kicked on his ribs, legs and hands. 

Piseth screamed for help but he knew that his voice was not heard.  The ordeal lasted for more than two hours.  Finally, the men that beat Piseth decided that it was enough, Piseth was left a broken man.  From this night onwards Piseth will succumb to their rules and do whatever he was told.

It was 6am in the morning when Piseth finally awaken.  His whole body and head were still in terrible pain. Piseth tried to get up but he stumbled and felt four times before he could stand up and slowly move himself.  Piseth began to have flash backs on the terrible memories under the Khmer Rouge regime when he was caught and was punished for stealing a yam stick.   Piseth could recall the day when he was tied under a tree packed with red ants and left to die as a result of his hunger for a single yam stick. 

The thought of death lingered in Piseth’s mind and the question of why he came back to his homeland after years escaping death and oppression infuriated his soul.  What did he do to deserve this again?  Was it Karma or was it fate that brought him back? 

Piseth stumbled and felt to the floor crying profusely. 

The bell rang, a loud speaker came on and instructed all inmates to leave the compound and line up for  morning labor. Every inmate scrambled to get outside because any inmate found inside after 10 minutes expired will be faced with extreme punishment.  For Piseth, he was too weak to get up but he knew the consequences if he could not make it outside in time.  Piseth crawled using one leg and hands clinging to the steel bars of the prison cell and was able to make it outside just in time before the 10 minutes deadline.

While outside, Piseth forced himself to get up despite the pain and injuries. 

Piseth was given a broom to clean about 50 meters in an area of the prison compound with 4 other men.   Fortunately, the other four inmates were foreigners, 2 Thais, 1 Malaysian and 1 Vietnamese all convicted on drug offenses.  Most of the foreigners spoke English and were able to relate to Piseth’s condition.  They share his pain because all of them had gone through the same ordeal when they first got to the prison.  The four other inmates did not want Piseth to work because they knew that Piseth was too weak to do anything and needed time to rest. 

In a team effort, the group was responsible and must ensure that the areas assigned were cleaned according to the instructions dictated by the prison guards. Piseth had time to recuperate by sitting under a tree and trying to take in the fresh air next to the pond.  Piseth also knew that he could not allow this temptation of being free from hard labor to go on very long.  So he decided to help pick up rubbish and tree branches and stuff them into a bag.

It was 11:45am morning, the loud speaker came on again telling all inmates to wrap things up and get ready for lunch.

By this time Piseth was already in his 48^th hour without food but only water.  The thought of foods brought immediate hunger to Piseth.  His stomach growled  and sharp pain began to race up and down his spine and sent shock waves to his brain as a result of excessive acid in his stomach.

After lunch, Piseth was approached by a prison guard and told that he had guests waiting outside.

 A prison  guard immediately escorted Piseth to the front of prison.  At the waiting room were a US consulate officer and an interpreter sent by the US Embassy in Phnom Penh.  The task of US consulate officer and the interpreter was to ensure that Piseth gets the necessary information regarding his rights to an attorney, rights to a trial, and an assurance as a US citizen Piseth will be looked after. 

Piseth was greeted warmly by the US Consulate officer.  It has been nearly 51 hours since his arrest that Piseth was finally able to meet somebody so that he can tell them his pain.  Piseth did not have to hide from the officer and the interpreter.  He told both of them the actual truth of what had happened.  The US consulate officer and the interpreter seemed to take notes on all of the complaints made against the Cambodian authorities about the harsh treatment that he had endured.  The officer and interpreter promised that they will do everything they can in their power to ensure that American citizens such as Piseth will be fairly treated while under custody. 

The officer handed a piece of paper to Piseth, on it contained a list of different lawyers who were willing to represent American citizens on a pro-bono basis or at an affordable price.  

The American officer and his interpreter left Piseth after no more than 1 hour meeting; yet their visit was meaningful and very reassuring for Piseth.  Piseth was unusually happy for at least the American Embassy knew about him and his case.  Furthermore, Piseth felt a sense of hope and his fear subsided because he knew that he will be protected by the by American government from further abuses. 

After the meeting with the US Consulate officer;  Piseth was escorted back to his cell.  Along the way, the prison guard snatched the paper that was given by the US Consulate and tore it into pieces; then made a mockery remarks by saying “This is not America, even George Bush cannot help you..”  Piseth was shaken by the remarks because he knew these prison guards meant business. 

When Piseth got to the main hallway of the prison leading up to his cell, there await a Giant.  Robi was known to all of the inmates as the “Big Brother”.  Robi was serving 40 years on numerous robberies and murders of 2 jewelry store owners in Kampong Cham Province.  Robi was notorious for his violent behaviors on other inmates and also known as the Collector appointed by the Prison Authorities. 

Piseth never knew these kinds of gang activities existed in Cambodia’s prison because he had only seen them in American movies . 

Robi was respected by all of the inmates.  For Piseth, Robi was just a little guy about half of his size. As expected, Robi made remarks to Piseth while he was passing the hallway; “Here come the Pork.”  It literally meant that Piseth was a “Commodity” and meant that Piseth could be “Extorted” for much cash because by this time they had been informed that Piseth was well to do Cambodian-American and had lands and properties.

This particular prison, size did not matter because it was whose ever was chosen secretly by the corrupted prison guards that was important.  There were no rival gangs in Battambang Provincial Prison because tactics used by these so called “Big Brothers” were so effective that no inmate dare to form a rival gang.  The tactic of breaking an inmate as early as his first hour in prison so that he completely loose his self confident became an effective tool employed.  Other tactics such as punishment for talking and extreme violence and torture used upon those who dare to challenge the gang’s ways of doing thing were routinely practices so that no inmate dare to fight back.  As a result, everybody becomes very submissive and scared.  These were also strategies most welcome by the prison authorities to try and keep all  inmates in check.  The “Big Brother” like Robi was left to roam free with the privilege to go out at night outside of the prison wall to karaoke bar and club as long as he kept things cleaned and bring in the money (by ways of extortions from fellow inmates) for the Prison Authorities..

Chapter 7: Doing Time for a Crime He Never Committed (Betrayal)

After spending two days in Phnom Penh, Piseth decided that it was time for him to depart Cambodia leaving the most precious and beloved Lily behind.  He never made phone call to his wife nor would he return to her with the land documents in which he promised.  For he only knew that he was innocent and did not commit the crime he was falsely accused of by his wife and his family.

In preparations for the departure to the USA, Piseth asked one his cousins to buy some dried fish and fermented fish, known as Prohok as a gift for his parents in the USA. 

Lightly packed, Piseth was ready to come home; leaving behind the mental anguish and frustration during the seven weeks that he spent with his wife, in Battambang. It was meant to be a short trip but it will be one of his most tortuous trips ever to his homeland.

A couple of friends accompanied Piseth to Phnom Penh International Airport.  Piseth was a little bit uneasy about his departure because he could sensed that something was about to happen.  Piseth actually requested his friends to stay behind in an event that something should happen at immigration.  One of Piseth’s friends was a little bit confused by the request because he did not understand what was going on.

Piseth had all of his baggage checked in then proceeded to have his passport checked by an Immigration Officer.  Piseth handed his passport over to an Immigration Police; thereafter, Piseth was told to go into an isolated room for interrogation.   Piseth was shocked and numbed, but in the back of his mind he knew that his wife and mother-in-law could turn against him.

Piseth was told that he was under arrest with a warrant placed against him by Battambang Provincial Court for a sexual crime committed against a juvenile.  Six Battambang provincial policemen came to Phnom Penh Airport to arrest Piseth back to Battambang. 

It was already 9:00pm by the time the Immigration Police and Battambang provincial policemen completed their paper works.  Piseth was handcuffed on both of his angles and wrists, blind folded and taken into a car by the six policemen and driven off to destination unknown to Piseth.  Piseth could have been killed along the way and nobody would know what had happened to him. 

Fortunately, the Duty Free manager at the airport recognized Piseth. The Duty Free manager happened to be one of the invitees at Piseth’s going away party at Washington restaurant. 

By this time, all of his friends had returned home because they never got the phone call from Piseth when he got to Immigration check out area.  Unfortunately, Piseth has never gone pass Immigration checkpoint.  Soon after the Duty Free manager learned about Piseth’s arrest; he immediately called Piseth’s friends and alluded to them that Piseth had been sent to Battambang province for a crime related to rape of some young girl there.

Piseth’s friends were frantic and wanted to do everything they could possibly do to help Piseth.  Lundi, one of Piseth’s closest friend and also was very connected with the Police, Ministry of Interior, and Immigration Department made a pleading call to the big boss, the National Police Chief to get him to help in the case. 

Apparently, due to the nature of the warrant, Piseth was arrested by the requests of numerous NGOs that were working to protect Human Trafficking, Child Protection and Human Rights in Cambodia.  Lundi was told that Piseth’s case was so serious that it would extremely difficult for the government to intervene because of the evidences resulted from the different autopsies performed on the victim by the doctors hired by the NGOs.

The blood stain, Piseth knew existed, but he never knew where it came from. The fresh injuries on the vagina of the victim made him an immediate criminal as suggested by his wife and mother-in-law who were first to come to these NGOs and Battambang Provincial Police. 

After 5 long hours in the police truck, blind folded, Piseth and his entourage finally reached Battambang Police station.  Immediately upon his arrival, Piseth was taken into a small cell with no window, no bathroom and have been cleaned for months.  The odor from the rotten feces and urine made it unbearable for Piseth, but he did not have a choice but to stay there for the night. 

In his entire life, Piseth had never experienced such hardship.  Piseth lived through Khmer Rouge regime as young man, but never in his life experienced such pain and anguish. 

A couple of policemen came to Piseth’s cell then took off his hand and leg cuffs.  Soon after, they take his blindfold off.  Immediately, Piseth was taken to the interrogation room.

Once in the interrogation room, Piseth was stripped of his personal belongings such as money, watch and necklace given to him by his mother.  Piseth was repeatedly beaten by two policemen with handguns and forced to confess on the crime he never commit.  After nearly 3 hours of repeated brutality; Piseth was forced to sign a confession paper that he committed the crime of raping his own sister-in-law.   

Weak and exhausted Piseth had to be carried back to his cell.  Piseth laid unconscious until the next morning when one of the guards threw a bucket of water on him.

Lundi, one of Piseth closest friends has gotten to Battambang Police Station just before dawn.  Lundi demanded that the guard allow him to see Piseth.  Given Lundi’s stature as one of the respected men in the military, he was allowed to see Piseth. 

Lundi felt a sense of rage and was in tears to see Piseth, his best friend in such conditions.  Lundi immediately requested that Piseth be moved from the rotten cell to a cleaner one and also be given a shower before dawn. 

Lundi, a trained officer and well known in his military circle was given access to the interrogation files about Piseth.  He was shocked to learn the chilling details of how Piseth had raped his own sister-in-law, Charya.  The interrogators described the details on the files so vividly, seemed as though they were witnessing the rape unfolding in front of their eyes. 

The statement reads:  ‘I, Piseth had gotten home at 2:30am on the night of the incident, drunk and did not know what I was doing.  I, Piseth went into the guest room where my sister-in-law was sleeping seduced her to come to my room and raped her.  Charya refused, but I, Piseth repeatedly ripped her bra, her under pant and proceeded until I succeeded in a vaginal intercourse with Charya, the victim, age 15.’ 

Lundi nearly felt off his chair after he read the statements.  How can these be true about a person he comes to know, trust and respect all of these years, Lundi asked himself?

After having read the disturbing details of the rape and the autopsy reports; Lundi was numbed and in disbelief. 

Lundi walked outside of the Police Station to the nearby court yard to catch some fresh air. To Lundi, there are many questions that need to be answered.  Case such as Piseth’s was not common and could potentially be a case of just simple greed, set up to destroy a person such as Piseth, too inexperience about Cambodia. 

Battambang Province was out of Lundi’s jurisdiction.  Lundi could not do very much, but to resort to making a few phone calls and try to understand the case a little bit better.  Lundi was about to take on Piseth’s case from a personal angle that was to do his own investigations of many unanswered questions.

By nine o’clock in the morning, local and international press has gotten hold of the story.  Journalists and cameramen sat outside of Battambang Police Station waiting for Piseth to be escorted out to the military truck and taken him to the Battambang Provincial Prison which was 30 minutes away from the town center. 

At around 9:30am that same morning, Piseth was escorted with a towel draped on his head toward to a truck waiting for him outside of the Police Station.  Piseth could only wished that his swollen face be shown so that the world can see the police brutality of a man not yet convicted.

Local media sensationalized Piseth story.  Piseth was portrayed as a ruthless child rapist and worst of all was named a vengeful husband.

After 30 minutes drive to the outskirt of Battambang, Piseth soon realized that he was now in for another surprise of his life.  Yet he knew that somehow, some ways, his best friend Lundi will find ways to get him out of there….

Chapter 5: Something Had Terribly Gone Wrong (Betrayal)

Piseth finally begins to understand his wife situation after having heard the negative rumors from different sources.  Yet, he was always forgiving.

Sopheap returned home empty handed after two days away from home.

When Sopheap got home, she could not even remember that her husband was to come from America. The lie that she made up about her daughter being ill was among the many lies that she made to herself and the people around her. 

Lily the daughter was nowhere to be found because she had left her with a friend in Poipet due to the fact that she was too busy gambling in the casino and enjoying herself.  By the time Sopheap got home, she was still very weak and overdosed by the drug.  Piseth rushed Sopheap to the hospital and got her the necessary treatment for drug overdose. 

Piseth did not say very much despite the negative rumors he heard about his wife.  One thing of his immediate concern was the safety of his daughter, Lily.  Sopheap finally admitted to Piseth that she had left Lily with a friend in Poipet.  As a caring father, Piseth rushed to Poipet by way of rental car and got Lily back to Battambang the same day. 

Poor Lily was already 6 years old and she has not been in school for awhile despite the fact that the mother had everything at her disposal.

Sopheap and Piseth reconciled.  Sopheap had promised Piseth that she will never commit such actions again to disgrace the family. 

One thing for sure, Sopheap already had things planned to destroy Piseth and his family.

By this time, Sopheap was in a love triangle with a new man in her life.  Piseth was naive, not knowing what had transpired of his beloved wife.  Sopheap had schemes to destroy Piseth and take over his properties so that she can fulfilled her dream with her new man and her crave for all of her addictions.

The relationship has begun to be on rocky roads...after two weeks of ongoing arguments; Piseth needed a break from everything. 

A friend called and invited Piseth out for a drink.  Knowing Piseth, he was never a big drinker and one can only described him as a social drinker.  The night lasted until 2am in a local beer garden.  Due to the stressful situation, Piseth had a little too much to drink. A couple of friends had to accompany Piseth to his home at the outskirt of Battambang.

It was after all Piseth's first time being so intoxicated.  He was able to make it inside his room; but he knew in his heart that he still had his clothes on when he passed out on his bed. 

Six o'clock in the morning, Piseth woke up to a room full of people some of whom he never knew.  He was told that something had terribly gone wrong.  Piseth was told by his mother-in-law that that he had raped his younger sister in law.  Piseth broke down in tears not knowing what to do.  He kept arguing that how it could possibly happened because all night long he was totally wasted and did not even have his clothes off.

After the incidence, the mother-in-law and Sopheap were furious or at least made it look as though they were extremely angry.  They both wanted Piseth dead.  And they meant it in every word they spoke to him.  After long winded conversations, the mother-in-law and Sopheap agreed that it would be in the best interest that Piseth leave the country and never again return.

It appeared on the surface that the mother-in-law and Sopheap planned it so well that Piseth believed everything that was handed down to him.  The blood stain on the mattress and injuries caused on the private part of the younger sister-in-law were gruesome reminders to Piseth.  Piseth bought every detail of the incidence and believed that if the mother-in-law or Sopheap decided to press charges; he would immediately face criminal charges involving rape with a minor.  The seriousness of the case can carry a sentence up to 30 years imprisonment, especially with foreigners such as Piseth.

A deal was struck but with the condition that Piseth leaves all of the land documents and kept them with Sopheap. Piseth may be naive but he was not so insane as to have all of the land and property documents left with Sopheap because he knew what could happen...

Piseth had exactly two days to plan because he sensed that his wife and mother-in-law had something up their sleeves for him.  Fortunately, all of the documents were left at bank in Phnom Penh, so Piseth told his wife that he would have to come to Phnom Penh and get all of the documents, then return to Battambang to deliver the documents before he leaves to USA.

Chapter 4: Heading to a Dangerous Hole (Betrayal)

After 4 years in the United State, Sopheap disliked the life style and  the fact that she had to work a 9-to 5 job.  She wanted to return to Cambodia. Piseth, at his wife’s repeated requests began to make preparations for her to return home.  By this time, Lily had been born and now 5 years old.  Sopheap wanted to take Lily back as well because she felt that Lily would be better living with her in Cambodia.  Final preparations were made and Piseth was to accompany both of them back to Cambodia.

Sopheap was overjoyed when she landed at Phnom Penh International airport and she knows that she will be free again to do what ever she wishes to do.  Due to Piseth commitment to his work and investments in the USA; he decided to come back after making arrangements for a new house to be built on a plot of land they bought in Battambang 5 years earlier. 

Piseth by this time still have his hotel investments in Siam Reap, Kampong Som and Phnom Penh and were generating significant amount of returns.  But he wanted to come back to the US to work at on his investments that he started 7 years earlier.  Both Sopheap and Piseth decided that it would be good for both of them to live separately for the time being until Piseth’s businesses in the US got settled and ready to be run on their own.

Piseth left Cambodia and returned to the US in despair leaving his wife and a daughter there on their own yet with the support of cousins and mother-in-law.  Life was beautiful at the beginning but as time went on, Sopheap began to have an affair with a guy affiliated with the Military Police after many late nights at the clubs.  Sopheap newly found freedom with money and support from abroad led her into night scenes of clubbing, drugs and gambiling.

Every night, Piseth would call to Sopheap and life seemed to be normal for Sopheap.  Sopheap would always responded that every thing was alright and under-control.  Piseth never doubted his wife because of his love for her.  He would only suspected on why Sopheap never let him talk to his child when ever he called.  Strange as it may sound, life was as normal and happy as any husband would ever hoped for because of the ways things were communicated to Piseth by Sopheap. 

Things gradually went down hill after Sopheap heavy gambling addictions.  Sopheap would be gone from home for weeks on end, living a player’s life in high end casinos in Phnom Penh, Thai-Cambodia town of Poipet and Bavet, Vietnamese Cambodia border.  These were the new haven s for illegal gamblings, drug dens, sexual trade and  re-known for  money laundering.  She managed to sell most of her jewelry that Piseth had bought for her during their time together. 

It was in Spring 2008, Sunday morning, the phone rang.   It was Sopheap pleading Piseth to come to Cambodia right away because their daughter has gotten very ill.  Piseth, by this time has not seen his daughter and wife for than a year decided to get the next flight out to see his daughter who was supposedly sick in Battambang, Cambodia. 

On board a jumbo jet bounded for home, Piseth reminished the memories that he had with his wife and the good times together.  He felt a sense of pride that Sopheap was able to turn her life around and became a good wife and a good mother.  Sopheap’s hardship during her teenage years made her strong and made her who she was to Piseth, a respectable wife.

Upon touching down at Phnom Penh International Airport, Piseth passed the immigration check point and checked out lonely without the fanfare that he used to get during his earlier trips to Cambodia.  This time, his arrival sort of marked a time of sorrow, loneliness, despair, and a sense of a broken man.  Can it be that these feelings will lead to events that were ready  to unfold before his very eyes? 

Piseth did not stay in Phnom Penh.  He told the airport taxi driver to take him to the bus station in which he will travel on to Battambang to meet his wife and daughter who awaited for him at home.

It was late in the evening when Piseth arrived in Battambang.  When Piseth arrived at home, he was shocked to see that his mansion had been boarded up with planks of wood.  His wife was no where to be seen.  Disturbed by the scene, he walked over to his neighbor’s house to ask them about what had happened.  Apparently, the house had been pawned by his wife so that she could fulfilled her crave for Ectasy, Yama and her gambling addiction. 

Sopheap was no where to be seen and none of her family members were able to reach her because she managed to switch her phone off.  The news of the daughter being ill was just a story made up to seduce Piseth to come back.  By this time, Sopheap had been planning some thing very grand.  Was it greed, addictions, and lost love?  It was difficult to guage Sopheap’s mind.  One could only imagined that she would have changed for the better for herself and her family.